The Africanisation of American politics



There has been a strange synthesis in politics, a reverse osmosis if you will. When an experiment has the reverse effect to what you envisaged. There has been this prevailing notion that if only African nations could be more like America – the land of the free and the home of the brave, then they will develop better. Markets will decide what levels of development we have. There is this idea that there is something inherently corrupt and irredeemable about our African nature that makes us undemocratic. If only we could shed our culture entirely will we be able to enjoy the fruits of modernity and Western excess. As we have seen in the West, particularly America, we have managed to infect them with our dirty politics, woe unto us. If we had an African election between a former First Lady who used her husband’s connections to build a business and political network that granted favours in exchange for money, they’d be stories of how this reflects our basic nature as corruptible beasts. If an African contender in an election had said he wants to expel a certain tribe he didn’t deem worthy, we would have ICC threatening charges. When Mswati holds his Reed Dance of young nubile semi-naked women, showing off their bodies for his personal amusement, we say SAVAGERY, Trump calls his “Miss Teen America.” Like Trevor Noah said, Trump would be the first African president of America. I tried to explain the absurdity of this to Africans, they just see it as politics as usual.


Bombastic rhetoric is a hallmark of African politics, when you talk to the international cameras you use the language of diplomacy, call your opponent an honourable Gentleman. However, when you go home and talk to crowds in your native language, it is talk of war, talk of murder, and talk of revenge. You tell your tribe that they are discriminated against by a system that favours the unworthy, hard workers are left behind while jobs go to those who don’t deserve it. You say that ONLY YOU can fix this mess. The truth is that, like most African countries, the elite is in bed together. They pretend to fight for the cameras but behind the scenes they joke and laugh together, while supporters fight each other.


No details are ever offered, solutions are deliberately vague, “We will increase GDP by 10% a year” How? Never an answer, instead you point to the mistakes of your opponent and smearing. “My opponent wants to increase your taxes and kill the economy” What do you want to do? I can’t tell you, but trust me, it’s all gonna be rosy. There has been no policy debate, much like an African election, just platitudes, or intense rambles from Hillary which are all smoke and mirrors. We can’t even agree on facts, something that should be irrefutable. Is the economy growing or shrinking? Depends on who you ask.


Jailing opponents is the inevitable element in African politics, when you have the power it is the first order of business after swearing in, some even jail them before. You have the power, what can stop you? Suddenly the tax office goes after the opponents businesses and those of their allies, the opponent is jailed on flimsy treason charges. There can only be one bull in the kraal so the loser must go to exile or jail, never to roam free where they can plot their eventual victory. Power is a roll of the dice, losers lose, winners win.


Trump won’t recognize if he loses, if he wins he expects Hillary to call him to congratulate him, but if he loses then he won’t accept. That is so African, no leader ever accepts defeat graciously, even if there was the slightest problem caused by bad logistics they blame they. A big man is never defeated, like a boxer who is knocked out but claims he was hit unawares. Trump wants to start another party after the GOP is done with him. A party centered around him, his ego, his connections, like an African party, when the leader dies, the party dies because  it was all based on patronage around him.


Mswati reed dance is seen as outdated savagery, but Trump televises his Reed Dances, he can walk into their dressing rooms as the undress, same stuff. An African would see this as his right to do so, to bless these fertile young women with his admiration. The grabbing of women and ravaging them is what Idi Amin did, many others, in fact more African president did than didn’t. Allegations of sexual predation against Trump have solidified his base, their man is sinned against. Much like when Jacob Zuma was accused, the woman was tarnished as a whore, supporters of Zuma made excuses for him. Why now? This was politically motivated, he would never do that, then, it was consensual. Bill Clinton was excused by a whole panel of prominent feminists, they stuck to him because he was from their political tribe despite his misogyny.



Claims of rigging and Ethnic divisions are part and parcel of every BBC report on an African election. Yet we hear it is neigh on impossible to rig an election in USA, we saw what happened in Florida 2000. Like in Africa, no need to rig, just deny voter ID to those less likely to vote for you. Around 14 states in the South, mainly Republican leaning, have made it harder for Blacks and other minorities to vote. Blacks are asked for 3 forms of ID, so a Driving License and passport are not enough, Whites are rarely asked for ID. In African election it is common to deny members of your opponent’s tribe the right to vote, even if they want to vote for you. In the areas supporting an incumbent even children get ID’s to vote, like in Kenya where Central had 110% voter registration while Nyanza province which votes for Raila Odinga only got 40% of voter ID’s. Instead of appealing to new voters with policies to excite them, it is easier to stop them voting, that way you don’t have to evolve as a party. This is what Republicans do, instead of appealing to Black and Latinos who make 30% of the nation and are increasing, they double down, block them from voting and stay the same.

White lives matter too, for the first time in history, stats are pointing downwards for whites. They have gone from 90% to 65% and will be down to 49% in 20 years. Rumors of the demise of the white race are now ringing true in some ears, the worst subsection are Trump’s core base – working class white males aged 45-55. These are the men left behind by globalization, the men who had safe Union jobs that are going abroad. There is a high mortality rate among these men, there is a 40% opiate addiction rate among this group and no one is listening to them. The solution was to medicate a generation that was likely to complain, the pharmaceutical companies saw a gap in the market to produce legal drugs; vicodin, zanax, percoset are all the exact chemical composition as cocaine or heroin, but legal. These drugs have been prescribed by doctors for profitand they put drug dealers out of business. The problem is when these prescriptions run out, they turn to real cocaine and heroin. Black went through this in the 70’s in the first wave of deindustrialization, crack and heroin ravaged societies, now whites suffer the same effects.


Corruption is the system, the system is not corrupt, it is working fine. You have to pay for play, no official will meet you unless you pay a donation to their reelection. Large companies pay absolutely no tax, by writing off their donations to the parties. If this was Africa, it would be corruption but in USA it is called Lobbying – we need to start using complex words to describe our corruption, lobbying fees aka bribes. What killed African democracy is killing American democracy, money, the collusion between the Political and Economic elite to preserve themselves ahead of others. In a democracy, the Political class should oversee the Economic, and economic class holds the political class accountable, but there was a secret deal. A wink, a nudge, that is all it takes, for the watchman and the thief to collude. Like Africa, the private sector is plundering the state, inflicting debt and deficits on the tax payer, the politicians collude to bail out these huge corporations.


Hillary will be more of the same, Big Business and Wall St will rejoice at her election, more corporate welfare. Trump would be a DISASTER in his own words, like having a 7 year old with nuclear codes, it could end humanity. So Hillary wins, but I hope she is blocked at every turn, and ends up a one term president and the dirty secretive style of government goes with her. She took control of the Democratic party apparatus so no other challengers could emerge, it only emerged later what a weak candidate she was. “Hillary lost to a black guy with a Muslim name, then barely beat a 74 year old Jewish guy, now she can’t even finish Trump. Hillary!!! We’re trying to make this easy for you and you can’t do it.” Said Bill Maher, comedian. It is like being asked if you want to get shot or stabbed. Hillary is the slower death, death by Wall St, death by deficit, secret deals behind backs. Take your pick, now you know how Africans feel about their politics.


No diggity Lyrics from 96 from Blackstreet

Rollin’ with the phatness
You don’t even know what the half is
You got to pay to play
Just for shorty, bang-bang, to look your way
I like the way you work it
Trumped tight, all day, every day
You’re blowing my mind, maybe in time
Baby, I can get you in my ride

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